Friday, June 02, 2006

Tee Times (A One Act Play)

Some keep the Sabbath going to Church--
I keep it, staying at Home--
WIth a bobolink for a Chorister--
And an Orchard, for a Dome--
Emily Dickinson, 1862


fade in

We see our hero, Mike D. is seen here at his computer.

Mike D. "I would like to invite you heathans to spend Sunday a.m. enjoying some of God's most incredible creations...grass, trees, creeks, GPS enabled golf carts, etc."

(applause)

Mike D. "At least two of you on this list have brand spankin' new golf clubs (Nike be praised), and it's time to unleash the beast(s). Randy Harris and I will be holding a post-sunrise service/poor golfing exhibition this Sunday starting around 9:30 or so, depending upon tee time availability at Pleasant Ridge Golf Club, formerly Bel Aire. "

(pause)

Mike D. "Let me know if any of you would like to join us. Feel free to invite whomever (whoever? whoseever? however? ho-no, ho-yes), although I think I've included all of all of your friends.

Mike Davis"

(fade to black)

Again we find our hero at the keys of his computer

Mike D. "Confirmed so far: Randy Harris, Steven Shipman, Danny Hanood, John Hizer, Me.
We have tee times at 9:20 and 9:28, with three spots left to fill. Lemmeknow. "

Best excuse so far: David Freeman, "I'll be at God Damned Tweetsie Railroad."...apparently putting the Little Engine that Could through the test of all tests.

Worst waffling: Ben "Pussboy" Owen (did you really have to ask). "I'm not sure how drunk I'll get on Saturday night."

Fuck it...I'm in! Am I really so much worse than the J.Alex excuse?!?
Benjamin "

fade to black

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