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at some point we are sane

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Call A Meeting

Cousin Kenny at Hooters

I swear I don't spend all my time at Hooters. I've only been five times in the last year and a half and these are all the photos I have. This is my cousin Kenny. He came out to Greensboro last Summer to hang out and see the sights. He tricked me into going on this night. (I would not have worn that t-shirt had I known I was going to Hooters. See other photos.)

Best Excuse Ever!

So I was talking to Dr. Bray today and I asked him if he had a chance to invite our new golf parnter Chris to go on another golf outing. Dr. Bray said that he had mentioned the trip to Chris and that he seemed excited about playing some more golf with us. Chris had to check and make sure it wasn't the same week he was going to be climbing Mount Kilimanjaro.

Yeah, the mountain in Africa. Chris, if you don't want to play with us just say so. I mean tell us your wife doesn't want you to go or something came up. But no, "I'll be in Africa that weekend." Dude.

Actually, it pretty cool to have golf buddies like this. Let's see repo guy, PhD, Private Dick, mountain climber, and ladies man. All we need is an Indian chief.

To learn more about Mount Kilimanjaro go to the following link.

http://www.africatravelresource.com/T1/africa/tanzania/ne/kili/0/intro/?gclid=CJaa8aLYkpICFQVzHgoda2RC7Q

Rom-Space Knight

Randy and Ken's 42nd Birthday at Hooters

Guy Getting Hit in the Sack with Tennis Balls

My friends Doug, Lara, Steve and Jenny run an Improv comedy club called the Idiot Box. They work clean, but every once in a while they do something they call Extreme Improv which has a lot to do with pain. Here we see one of the "Idiot Boxers" getting hit in the nuts with a bunch of tennis balls. (I just photographed this-I did not throw anything.)

Four Deer in My Backyard

This is really not good video footage, but I feel like I need to prove to the world that I do have deer in my backyard from time to time. I live in the city limits of Greensboro and when I tell even my neighbors that I've had up to five deer standing in my yard at one time they look at me like I am crazy.

Hooters Hula Hoop Girl

Morningwood Golf and Country Club

This year's Great Golf Outing was held at the Morningwood Golf and Country Club. (members only) If you would like your own Morningwood t-shirt go to the following link.

http://cgi.ebay.com/Morning-Wood-Country-Club-T-Shirt-Funny-EMO-retro-L_W0QQitemZ190198461037QQcmdZViewItem?IMSfp=TL0802130876a23785

2008 Great Golf Outing

Ok, so we went to a lot of Hooters.

2008 Great Golf Outing

Losers at the 2008 Great Golf Outing were forced to smoke grape Swisher Sweets.

2008 Great Golf Outing

Defending GGO Champion Mark Eakes prepares for his Sunday round by meeting with his swing coach and trainer.

2008 Great Golf Outing

The Masters doesn't have one of these.

2008 Great Golf Outing

This is not Sergio Garcia.

2008 Great Golf Outing

Just to see if anyone would notice, this week we have replaced all of the photos of Mike D with photos of Dr. B.

Great Golf Outing

To play at this level you need to feed the machine.

2008 Great Golf Outing

All players in the 2008 Great Golf Outing began their day with breakfast at Granny Allyn's Country Kitchen.

Someone Remind Me to Punch Mike D in the Face the Next Time I See Him

Here we see Mike D and the Boss Lady at the big Super Bowl Party. I'm not sure where his hand was going, but I'm pretty sure I will need to punch him in the face for it.

Two Unidentified Feminist

It was made with love.

Here is a shot of Mike D eating a piece of the wonderful ice cream cake.

Super Bowl Ice Cream Cake

This is a photo of the ice cream cake I made for Doug and Lara's Super Bowl party. I wanted it to look like a football, but Kelly said it looked like a fish.

Mike Davis Birthday Party Photos

More Photos of Mike D

One of my many readers called me at work today to complain that there were no new photos of Mike Davis on the Fred Hotline. Well, we would never want to live in a world like that so here are a few more photos of Mike D. in action.

Mike Davis Turns 40

These are just a few of the shots from Mike D's 40th birthday party that could not be shown on the Greater Greensboro Open Blog. Enjoy

The Following Events Are Based on a True Story

I'm on this walk with my wife and my in-laws when we spot a troop of monkeys. I guess it's a troop, or it could be a barrel. You know, like a murder of crows, an array of hedgehogs or a bloat of hippopotamuses right?

Anyway, I look at the main monkey and give him the cool-guy-head-tilt-thing “What's up?” look and he gives me the cool return “What's up?' head-bob-thing and I know we're cool. We're cool until Spike, my mother-in-law, is like “Hey, look at those monkeys!” and starts to walk over to them. I said “Spike don't. Those monkeys will mess you up.”

Now that I think back on it I wasn't very convincing. In my heart I really wanted to see what would happen when my mother-in-law came in contact with the barrel of monkeys. So she goes over and says “Well hello there” in her really high pitched tone and yeah it made the monkeys mad and they picked her up and carried her off.

Later, at the fish place, we went ahead and ordered Spike some hushpuppies and a water with lemon. We waited for about half an hour before the EMTs and the animal control people brought her back. They were asking her a bunch of monkey related questions.

I took a picture of Spike there on the patio of the seafood place answering the animal control lady's questions. They both looked at me in shock as if I had just done something really offensive. I just looked at them both and said it was for insurance purposes. It wasn't. I just wanted to remember the day my mother-in-law got carried off by a carload of monkeys. I told her they would mess her up.

Hizer Demoralized Davis (Right in Front of Harris)

In a dramatic change of events, the perennial trophy winner Randy “Fancy” Harris was shut out of the final non sequitur trophy contest of 2007. A mysterious competitor from the East named John Hizer was victorious on the last day of 2007.
Hizer pressured a broken Mike Davis up to the 18th green. Davis, who lead the match at the turn by a stroke over Harris and 6 strokes over Hizer, showed signs of fatigue after weeks of being demoralized at the hands of Fancy's superior play. The crowds at Crooked Tree Golf Course have grown accustomed to the high level of play from Harris and Davis over the remaining contests of the 2007 schedule.

Comparisons to Jack and Arnie were made early in the season, starting when Davis improved his putting stroke and was able to control his powerful drives. Patience was the most valuable club in the bag during this three way tug-of-war for supremacy as Davis and Hizer waited for Harris to defeat himself. While Harris and Hizer had never competed before this match, word of Fancy's struggles with Crooked Tree's 15th hole had obviously proceeded him. Harris managed to bring the water into play on every shot on 15, including on the putting surface, as he put three balls into the drink and carded a 12, thus ending his chances of taking home the coveted prize.

In a truly ironic twist Mike D's putting abandoned him on the putting green as he met the younger, better looking Hizer for a tie breaking putt off. Davis was praised weeks earlier for his improved putting stroke only to see it forsake him with the coveted non sequitur prize on the line.

2007 Hilton Head

John Bray Hitting a Mushroom with a Golf Club

I may have passed along a few of my bad habits to John Bray during our recent golf outing. He saw me hitting a few mushrooms and wanted to give it a try. What I love about this clip in the way in which John takes a practice swing before hitting the mushroom.

This is How We Spent Our Halloween.

We gave candy to a couple of neighborhood kids and then we went to the mall. My sister Niki was dressed as a Yankee Candle employee.
One of these two is wearing a costume.

My Tigger at Target.